A LICENSE TO PARENT

In our society, we need a license to drive a car on a public street. We need a license to practice law or medicine, to be a professional contractor, electrician or plumber, to hunt deer or to fish a public stream. Even a dog or cat needs a license to survive these days. You need a license to marry.

But you do not need a license to have or raise our precious children.

The law generally assumes that children born into a valid marriage “belong” to the parties to that marriage. Custody, parent time and related legal rights between lawfully married parents generally do not need to be proven, unless there is a divorce or legal separation.

If you choose to sire, conceive, bear, and raise up these treasures, do it right. Love them. Take quality time with them, and lots of it. Choose their other parent with care before creating this important life. Be kind to the other parent.

Kids are damaged when parents fight. It’s not about you. It’s about them. And they know when there is undue stress or abuse of any kind in the home. They rarely, if ever, recover from it.

Children are your trust. Their needs must come before your own, despite the noise you may hear from “modern” counselors of the joys of a self-centered life.

For a better marriage, or when serious strains appear, good professional counseling from a clinical psychologist or a licensed therapist is often helpful. But if all fails, hire a good lawyer to protect yourself and your children.

See our blog “Choose Your Lawyer Well”.

CHOOSE YOUR LAWYER WELL

In the old days, we duked out our differences. Then we hired surrogates to fight for us—Knights on white horses, perhaps. Now we hire lawyers as our surrogates.

If you are establishing parental rights, getting a divorce, seeking a modification, defending or enforcing a protective order, you will do better if you retain a competent lawyer to represent you. Downloading forms from the internet does not substitute for experienced, knowledge-based advocacy. Neither does following the “advice” of relatives, bar buddies, well-meaning friends, or other amateurs.

Here are  eight questions you should always ask a prospective lawyer before you entrust one with what is valuable to you:

  1. Are you licensed and in good standing with the state bar?
  2. Do you have any history of discipline by any state bar?
  3. Did you graduate from an accredited law school? Where?
  4. Do you carry errors and omissions (i.e. malpractice) insurance? For how much?
  5. What is your hourly rate, initial retainer, and how do you determine billings?
  6. Will you respond to my reasonable inquiries within one business day or as soon thereafter as is possible if it is impossible or impractical to so respond?
  7. Do you focus on family law, or are you a “jack of all trades”?
  8. How long have you been practicing law? How much of that time has been devoted exclusively or primarily to family law?

With these questions you can usually separate the good attorneys from the hustlers before you lose a deposit or get your case so screwed up that it will cost you extra even to get back to square one, if that is even possible.

Always:

  1. Hire an attorney with no bar discipline record.
  2. Hire an attorney who refuses to guarantee a specific outcome. Those “guarantees” don’t exist.
  3. Hire a properly licensed attorney who focuses solely on family law.
  4. Hire an attorney with at least 10 years experience in the practice of family law.
  5. Hire an attorney who is responsible enough to maintain a solid errors and omissions policy.
  6. Insist on a written contract of retention with clear and understandable terms. Don’t ever fall for the old “Give me a thousand dollars and I’ll do your case” ploy. Too often the $1,000 disappears and your case stagnates.
  7. Insist on one business day or less for response to your inquiries, and copies of everything generated or received in your case.

At THE HUNTSMAN FIRM, we strive to represent you well, effectively, and with full disclosure.